Feature: Songs of Remembrance (Part Two)
This is part Two, but if you missed Part One here’s a brief refresher!
I’ve never been a lyric guy.
Now that I have your attention please understand I realize lyrics are important otherwise we just have instrumental music, right? Honestly for the most part of my life I’ve only cared about the riff, the barrage of power chords, the vocal melody that leads to the hook.
Alas without a vocal melody (that’s where those pesky lyrics come in) many songs would be lost. No payoff, no anthem no HOOK to get you to listen again and again.
All that being said, this article is about those WORDS that are put to music. More importantly, how those words impacted me in some of the darkest times of my life. I can honestly say that the Holy Spirit used these specific tracks in times of doubt, in times of desert wandering, in times of loss, in times of divorce (which might as well say death, because the destruction of a relationship is a death in its own right.)
And honestly I hope you don’t mind that I’m gonna bare my soul at this point in this article. Without some life context the songs themselves are just bits of musical fluff, whimsical thoughts attached to endearing melodies that may or may not have importance. Truly only in the eye of the beholder.
Joshua 4:6-7
“Let this be a sign among you, so that when your children ask later, saying, ‘What do these stones mean to you?’ then you shall say to them, ‘Because the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord; when it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off.’ So these stones shall become a memorial to the sons of Israel forever.”
Source: https://bible.knowing-jesus.com/Joshua/4/7
In the same way there are songs that through the decades have become my “stones” or “rocks” of remembrance. However when I first discovered the deep meaning for me in these songs, I wasn’t expecting it. I really wasn’t, again I’ve really never been a ‘lyrics guy’…
I can’t say that so much anymore.
Let me introduce you to 12 songs that impacted me and drew me closer to the Lord, or at least reminded me in a personal way that the Lord was still with me. Even if I really thought I’d been left on the heap of discarded refuse.
By the way these aren’t in any particular order. There isn’t one song more important than another. With that thought let me also include here that there are a few songs THAT ARE NOT METAL. Heck one of them doesn’t fit in the rock genre at all, with that being said don’t get your panties in a wad there is plenty of crushing metal encouragement to go around.
Track #7
Rez – Rain Dance from 1988s “Silence Screams”
1988 was an exciting time for me on the surface. Writing for White Throne Magazine, I was also a roadie setup tear down gear for one Rick Hunter of San Francisco Bay Area’s Christian Metal band Soldier. So many things were happening at the time with Soldier. I really was part of that family and still have several deep connections there.
Church, I attended a new church called Refuge in Castro Valley. It was a lot like Sanctuary in Hollywood. Actually right after the Metal Mardi Gras in 1987 Bob Beeman came north and met with quite a few of us about starting something in the Bay Area. Members of Soldier, Crossforce and many other interested parties met with Bob in a round table of sorts. If my memory serves, we all met in the home of Soldier drummer Al Whalen.
Anyway despite all of this exciting stuff something was missing within me. I felt like being in the desert spiritually. Honestly this type of thing has happened several times throughout my life, perhaps you have experienced that as well.
I remember praying often for the Lord to move in my life. Yet it seemed God was silent, was he really hearing me? Was there something within me that prevented God from answering me or was there too much noise in my life which blocked my ability to hear?
“Talkin’ to myself
Ideas and images covered with dust
Memories well-worn from constant use
Stained by loneliness and lust
Heaping on my heart abuse
Somebody tell me, what’s the use?
Somebody tell me
Somebody tell me, what’s the use?”
Seemingly I was being pulled in several directions as I would ask for guidance from many of my friends who had multiple theological persuasions left me a little confused. A lot confused…
The summer of 1988 and for the next several years California was in a drought (no surprise in 2025!!) and it really hadn’t rained for months at this point. Regardless I was listening to this song in my car on the Nimitz Freeway Highway 880 down near Fremont I believe. I started praying as I drove, asking God once again to please move in my life.
And as the lyrics of the song got to the end I continued to drive and pray…
“Love, cold and wet against my skin
Where do you end? How do you begin?
I’m so lost, in a world without Your breath
Afraid of being touched without tenderness
Needing Your fire, fearing Your flame
Could I surrender, waiting for the rain?
Streaming rain, come on, rain
Lord, send Your rain, rain
Rain, rain, rain, oh…”
And I can tell you the Lord answered my prayer as it started to sprinkle on the windshield of my car. Not a lot, it was cloudy that day but several drops did appear and I was shocked (and back then it wasn’t common to use your windshield wipers while driving to get someone to back off if following to close.)
A coincidence? A reminder that God was with me? I’ll take the later. Those things don’t happen much in my life but when they do I will cling to them.
Again I quote Matthew quoting the Old Testament “A bruised reed He will not break, and a smoldering wick He will not extinguish…” Matthew 12:20
In the Resurrection Band Catalog there are actually quite a few songs forgotten by many remembered by few that speak to me in this way, Broken Promises from 1978s Awaiting Your Reply, Every Time It Rains from 1979’s Rainbow’s End, The Struggle from 1980’s Colours to name a few.
Track # 8
Narnia – When The Stars are Falling from 2009s “Course of a Generation”
2011 was a rough year. A very rough year. Bankrupt, Divorced (again) new job doing pest control(!) so I basically worked by myself all day long. Lot’s of time to be trapped inside your head if you know what I mean. Wondering, praying, and desiring to just get past the pain…
Honestly there were two different Narnia tracks I could’ve picked but this one hits me still.
“Face to face with the liar
Once again he plays his role
Tempting me, dark desire
Sense the evil of his soul”
The enemy coming at me, but also simply allowing me to wallow in my own pain trying to nudge me to some self destructive behaviors. Subtly but undoubtedly there were temptations.
“Lift me up and lead me on
In my weakness You are strong
You are with me when the night is falling
When the world is upside down
When the king has lost his crown
You are with me when the stars are falling”
How many times as I drove to my first client at 5:30 a.m. did my mind implode on itself trying to figure everything out. Trying to understand and having to come to some resolution that my life situation can’t be reduced to some Theological equation, A + B = ???.
Yes 2 Corinthians 12:9 comes to mind “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Yet quoting that verse doesn’t remove the pain of having my heart and soul simply crushed. However the song itself impressed on me that God is there and with me, regardless of what my emotional state was at the time.
Track #9
Whiteheart – Let the Kingdom Come from 1989s “Freedom”
I was fortunate enough to see Whiteheart live on the Freedom tour. It was a show with Petra on their ‘On Fire’ tour, where Whiteheart ‘opened’. Before this gig I was only scarcely aware of Whitehearts music, the occational pop track it seemed.
However at this show the showed the musical prowess and proficiency with a performance that was devastating. No stripped down guitars or ultra produced tracks.
Whiteheart simply KILLED IT! And Tommy Sims showed why he is a completely unheralded bass player. I was blown away (Petra who?) by the utter devastation the entire band brought. Great America in Santa Clara California was left a burning ruins by the devastation they wrought.
OK, enough about that, I could on and on.
THE SONG, here was the third track from the Freedom album and with that amazing Tommy Sims bass line. One for the ages.
It starts with that ongoing bass part with occasional guitar flourishes from Gordon Kennedy and Billy Smiley. The understated vocal brought initially by Mark Gershmehl and capped off in the chorus by Rikk Florian.
There have been many, many times during my life where the lyrics pierce my heart like a razor. Going through divorce, brings out lots of garbage and pain from within, and the desire is to take the reigns and tell yourself “I can do this, myself…”
And I’m reminded that I can’t do it… No I can!! No I CAN’T…
“I’m layin’ down my crown
Yes, I’m layin’ down my crown
Lord, I’m layin’ it down
And praying let Your will be done
Lord, I’m layin’ down my crown
To let the Kingdom come” …
I forget it’s the Lord who brings rest. It’s the Lord who brings PEACE… It’s Lord who is always there, when I forget to shut my gullet. My pride gets in the way. I need to make more money. I need personal satisfaction in my life.
28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30 New International Version
“Cause I’m so tired and weary
Yes, I’m so tired and weary
Lord, I’m weary and hurtin’
From the back breakin’ burden of my crown
My soul is born weary
Oh, let the Kingdom come” …
This song with it’s massive build up musically. It’s not a pop track but a brilliantly written and performed bit of proggy rock.
The songs goes on and Gershamel brings the emotion drenched vocal of man looking for his God. As I’m looking for mine…
“Well, I crowned myself king
Yeah, I crowned MYSELF king
But I didn’t see the trouble
The heartache and the sorrow it would bring, oh
Now I’m broken and weary
And lookin’ for my King”
I gotta tell you that as I write these words I’m reminded of Labor Day weekend of 2001. My ministry failed, my marriage was failing (and failed 6 weeks hence) and that was only the beginning of a very long and painful journey. That particular time was simply devastating to me, personally, spiritually, emotionally, family wise with 3 small children.
“King of Glory, enter in
And sear my heart with love’s burning flame
Oh, let Your will be done
O Lord, let the Kingdom come…”
Amen.
Track #10
Sacred Warrior – Sword of Victory from 1988s “Rebellion”
On the burn CD I had made for myself in 2011 I added several “worship type songs.” It was a hope that I could focus and not let my loneliness and pain overwhelm me. I had to kill bugs (yes I worked as an exterminator for almost two years. I think I mentioned this earlier)
This was a song of overcoming and victory. Y’know too many times people drop those platitudes about how “something better will come,” “God won’t give you more than you can handle,” “Just read your Bible and pray.”
Y’know… none of that is helpful in the deepest pit. You want the pain to be gone.
SO I would listen to the chorus of this tune. Rey Parra would just belt it out…
“And we all will walk in victory
With a sword in our right hand
We will stand for all the world to see
That the truth has set us free
Oh!! “
The song brought me a lot of joy and resolve, much like the Barren Cross tune mentioned previously ‘King of Kings’
When the line providing strength hits it would add much needed encouragement to my spirit.
“I will give you the strength you need
And the courage to stand alone
If you fight for me there’ll be victory
And a crown when you get home”
It does take courage to stay close to Jesus, especially when it just seems that your life has disintegrated into dust. I’m sure there are many who would chastise me and say, “You’re faith is weak brother. You should pray and read your Bible more!”
You know what? My faith is WEAK. Without the grace of the King I am nothing but dust and he is the only one who can provide me the grace I need! I’m still wandering in the desert and I need to hold onto the hand of the one who brought me this far. It’s the judgement of others that drives me away from the congregation of the Body.
My faith was weak then and my faith is weak now. I’m no super Christian, I’m Peter who walked out to Jesus and sank because he took his eyes off of him. I’m Thomas who said “Unless I see the scars.” “Unless I see the wound in his side.” It is by the Grace of Jesus that I’m here.
I need the courage of Jesus.
Track #11
Rob Rock – Warrior from 2005s “Holy Hell”
This song was always a worshipful headbanger to me. It always seemed to bring me a lot of joy and a reminder that I just needed to hold onto Jesus.
The song itself has been on 3 or 4 different releases. Once from Impellitteri, twice from Driver. The original demo release from back in the day and the Driver rework in 2008 and this solo album.
It has always been a favorite and rightfully so.
“Am I dreaming?
I don’t believe it
In the dead of night
I could hear the voice that showed me life
I’m a warrior – take my hand
Let me lead you to the promised land
I’m a warrior- take my hand
Side by side we’ll make our final stand
I’m a warrior”
Such a powerful lyrical component that brings me joy. It delivers a musical punch that sticks with me. Such great guitar work from CJ Grimmark, truly a phenomenal player. It elevates the track to the status I believe it has earned.
This is simply one of those songs that lifts my spirits when I hear it. Isn’t that what a good song of worship/encouragement should do?
Track #12
Petra – Bema Seat from 1983s “Not of This World”
It was New Years Eve 1983 and I was 16. I was a full on metal head, headbanger make no mistake. Rush, Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, Saxon, Metallica, Black Sabbath, Riot (NY), AC/DC, Raven, Dio and way too many more to list. That was my music. My identity. My heroes.
I was at a youth group party for New Years eve. Lots of friends were there as I was getting acclimated to this new thing, a youth group. I had been to a Christian summer camp through my parents church (a long story) many times and had given my heart to Jesus. However after a week of being home those fuzzy feelings would fade and I’d be back to being the same ole me.
Well at this party people were listening to this Christian Rock Band called Petra on a Walk Man. Apparently they were coming in 4 weeks to do a show in the south bay (San Jose). I heard some folks kinda chatting about it.
Hmm what is this? After a period of time someone asked me if I wanted to listen and I said sure. I sat down in a chair and put the headphones on. The first thing I hear is this keyboard. An introduction of some kind, okay. Not bad I guess. Hmm where is the crunchy guitar?
Then the next track starts…. and it’s acoustic guitar? What is this? A ballad? Sigh… Well let’s see, maybe it’ll pick up. Sounds like church music to me. This definitely wasn’t heavy metal. Okay… What’s the next track like?
WHOA!! A muscular guitar riff with some heft. Not metal but driving hard rock! What the heck is a Bema Seat?? Okay there’s keyboard but the guitar is driving it all along. This is pretty good. Oh wow a guitar SOLO!!! I’m digging this, the solo’s a little short…next song… More acoustic guitar?? sigh…
Anyway, my buddy Fred asked me what I thought and I remember answering him “Well I listened to 3 songs or so… one track was really cool.. but too much acoustic guitar…”
I got a ticket for the Petra gig at the San Jose Civic, January 27 1984. Without totally giving a blow by blow description. Quite simply the Lord used that show to change my life.
My fire was lit for the Lord and it remained constant. Despite the pain and turmoil of my adult years I have attempted to remain a faithful servant. Without the grace of God I wouldn’t be writing this.
So there are twelve songs that made an impact on my life at different times. What are Twelve songs that made an impact in your own life? The markers of spiritual growth? I hope you enjoyed this little journey with me. Blessings to you.
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